My fantasy for today... and a rant

What I wouldn't do for a spa day. I could kill for a mani-pedi and full body wax. Why must pregnancy require so much hair to grow every where but where I want? I would have thought I'd be able to grow my head hair all long and sumptuous but, alas, no. I finally got sick of it and chopped it off into a faux-hawk. Feels much better.

Instead, my eyebrows and leg hair make me look positively neanderthal and let's not even talk about the other part. I totally get why doctor's want to shave it - you can't see a thing down there! I'd go for a trim and a bikini wax at least to save my thighs the embarrassment they are currently suffering.

Of course, some more massage would be good. I had to fire my regular massage therapist for a few reasons. First, I felt she really didn't have the technical expertise to call herself a "pregnancy Massage therapist". Second, she routinely brought up difficult topics or gossiped during our sessions. Please keep your anti-muslim comments to yourself and no, I don't care about the "cute guy at church saga" Frankly, I'm not interested in your sagas - this is my time. Third, she clearly didn't respect my choice for a natural birth process and would make repeated comments about where I will get me epidural and that I'll change my mind. Thanks for your confidence and support.

While I understand epidurals are the right thing for some women and are appropriate for certain births, I'd like to have the option of going without. Millions of women before me have done so, why is it so hard to imagine?

Welcome to Rane's Soapbox.

Unless it is medically necessary, meaning someone is in danger, I plan on having a baby the way I was made to do so. The creator or evolution or whatever it is that made us this way, didn't imagine epidurals or narcotics into it. Besides, I enjoy physical and emotional challenges. If I can snowboard a double black diamond and live to laugh about it, I think I'll be fine. I think I have good coping mechanisms in place and have learned some more in my birth class. I also have an amazing husband with whom I've grown so much closer to during this process. His instincts and gentleness will get us through this as much as my will and determination. I've been working on not being attached to much to the outcome. As a friend recently told me, "it's just a day. The real work is being a mother every day." She also said, "there's no harm in trying." when considering a VBAC, which came through successfully.

Thank you. That concludes the soapbox portion of our broadcast day.

Baby updates: I feel huge. I feel as if he grows with every day. He moves a lot. Most of the day, in fact. I now can see his limbs as they make wide, sweeping movements from one side to the other. I am constantly in a state of amazement and feel tired from all the growth.

Feel free to send cheesy fictional novels in the genre of chick lit, romance, historical fiction, or humor. I'm devouring books like crazy. At least 2-3 books a week!

The dog is laying close and farting audibly to communicate her displeasure at not having been taken to the dog park yet. Olfactory senses overwhelmed, I must open a window and make my escape. Off to Marymoor!

Honey, can you spray my butt?

This Post Partum Recovery Kit seems like the right way to spell relief. The question is, do you want to know if it works?

Is my baby a burrito?

How will I get this little bundle of joy around? I can't imagine even wanting to let him go for a few months! (Yes, you can point and laugh later.)


The Moby Wrap

I wrap this long piece of stretchy fabric around me and put the little bug in all snug and close. I can wrap it a few million ways, including the "Discreet Nursing" style and baby's weight (up to 35 lbs) is evenly distributed evenly along both shoulders and my back. Now it's time to choose the color - Am I Sienna, Chocolate or Red?

Swaddling Blankets

Why are these things so expensive? And why do they think I need a special "patented design" to fold a blanket? I tried the Swaddle Me on a friend's baby - not a fan. Plus you have to buy the next size up when your baby grows. That's just annoying! Much easier to just use a normal receiving blanket, like this or these.

And for those not yet in the know, the Carter's sizes are better for swaddling than Gerber.

Nursing Cover

In case the Moby isn't on at the time and I don't have the extra receiving blanket, this nifty Nursing Cover is attractive and cool. Also sold under the name of "Hooter Hider," "Modest Mommy" or "Bebe Au Lait" with equally nice fabrics and almost the same design, the Joia Mommy cover is fully reversible! It's so hard to choose, but I think I love the Hot Dot Brown with Teal Dot/Brown and Teal Sassy Stripe best!

Baby Registry?

I'm having a hard time with this. What do I want and what do I really need? Plus I'm finicky when it comes to these things. I don't want things that scream "I'm a breeder! Love my cute baby!" I keep wondering, why can't I find baby things in fun, bright colors? It seems everything has to have cars and trains or bows and dolls and is relegated to the customary pale pink/blue/yellow/green. Boring! How about ROY G BIV? Remember the rainbow?

So, I'm attempting to compile a list here of things I'd really enjoy and can use because everything I like is on a different website. I'm totally set up on clothes until around 24 months, so if you are so kind to want to gift us, here are a few things you can do!

Diapers: We have decided to use a diaper service! Cloth diapers are healthier for baby and don't contribute to landfill to sit unchanged for 500 years. This service is a little less than buying disposable diapers and I don't have to launder them. Isn't that lovely?


Seattle Diaper

* (206) 634-BABY
* (800) 562-BABY

The nice ladies in the office will be happy to help you contribute to our account (ie, the Lederers). A month is about $67 - even helping us pay for a week will help tremendously!

And to cover up those cloth diapers:

http://www.cottonbabies.com/product_info.php?cPath=22&products_id=781

Cotton Babies offers a mix pack in any size so I can try a variety and see what I like. Handy, eh?

Diaper Bag: The Ju-Ju-Be Small is just perfect. I have a large one for when I need it but this is just the right size to grab and go. It's hard to decide between the gorgeous prints they offer and it isn't covered in a heavy plastic - it's just nice fabric that's Teflon coated so I can wipe off spills and look good doing it. Citrus Sorbet is where this hot mama's at!

http://www.littledudesanddivas.com/bsmlctrssrbt.html

For extra fun and ease, stroller clips:

http://www.littledudesanddivas.com/jjbstrlclp.html

And Super Grab and Go: This little wristlet holds a few diapers and wipes for super quick trips. And it matches the diaper bag! Freakin' sweet!

http://www.littledudesanddivas.com/jjbbqctrssrbt.html

Check back for more stuff later and look for postings tagged with "baby registry."

Thank you so much!

RnR

30 weeks now...

Here's the belly as of 10/5/07. I love our little digicams (courtesy Bobbo and Donna - thanks!) because they have this cool feature where you flip the lens around to take self portraits - very fun! I just wish I had slightly longer arms.

Everybody asks "how are you feeling?" And for the most part, I'm feeling great. I also feel huge, exhausted, and generally prefer to be horizontal watching old episodes of Macgyver, A-Team or Monk. But I walk the dogs everyday, or almost everyday if it isn't a total downpour and that helps.

I really miss being able to be active - going on long hikes in the rain is a wonderful thing to do here. I love the smell of the woods when it rains and everything perks up so nicely. Plus under the tree canopy, it isn't raining as hard - you can just enjoy it. But I find my heart races at the slightest exertion and I get paranoid that I'll rupture my aorta and bleed out before I can even call 911. I read it somewhere and it terrifies me.

But after a little www research, I feel better. Aortic ruptures are not very common during pregnancy and mostly have to do with women who have one of a few syndromes for which I am not at risk. Ah, much better now. But honeyman says he still doesn't want me hiking around carrying med kits at events with terrain that is anything other than flat and larger than a few blocks. (I volunteer doing first aid with the Red Cross at local events - mostly street fairs or running events.)

It's funny the things that scare me - aortic ruptures, losing my man - especially losing my man. How would I raise my son without him? Where would I live? How could I adjust the dreams of the life I'm building with my husband to surviving and raising a son? I would - I know I would, but I don't want to. I really don't.

So, raise your glass to the naming of the Fear. Here's to the belief that calling it out shrinks it to bits - diaspora on the wind, diluted and scattered far and away. Good - let's call it a day.